Soledad

Photos taken by me at various places in New York City, NY

~

memories are weird.
different potions from different period of times tend to vanish, till they totally disappear.
those memories are usually sad, desperate, and regretful.
but all of a sudden, they come back, goods or bads, piece by piece, time to time, unpredictably.
and when i try to grasp them, they just fade out, unpredictably, again.
and it loops.
as for me, struggling in the vortex of memories, wrenched, till the vortex ceases out.
yet another loop begins.

~

i just realize that every Tuesday is the day that i talk the most, mostly because of the labs.
and i merely talk except when i buy food from the cafeteria counter for the rest of weekdays.
–
kinda got used to that already anyway, for knowing what kind of person i really am;
then i just pretend i don’t need any interactions;
and gradually i’d become more and more self-isolated since i’m here in New York.
–
i do make “friends” though, from one class to another, one lab to another.
i just have a hard time maintaining these “friendships”, or rather, i just don’t know how to.
thus when the semester’s over, the friends-making progress starts over.
another loop.

~

i feel like talking a lot.
i just don’t know where to start.
until next loop.

~